“I’m not good enough, I’m too tall, I’m too short, I’m too fat, I’m too skinny”
Any of those ring a bell?? If they do, don’t worry…you’re not alone. Lack of self-confidence is a very common issue.
But common as it may be, when you’re striving for excellence, as you push forward with your goals and endeavour to shape your future to be extraordinary, a lack of self-confidence is NOT something you want hanging around your neck.
It may be a common issue but it’s one that carries a heavy weight and if you’re shooting for the stars you need to be able to cast this dead weight aside in order to maximize your true potential.
In order to do this you first need to understand where a lack of self-confidence stems from.
You may be surprised to know that an important factor in our self-confidence is not necessarily what others say about us, but rather what we say about OURSELVES!
Here’s a simple example…
What’s the first thing you say to yourself in the morning when you look in the mirror?
Is it: “Good morning gorgeous! Looking hot and rested, let’s have a great day J”
Or is it more like: “Holy crap, I look terrible!!! And this freaking spot in the middle of my forehead… Damn that belly looks disgusting, what can I wear to cover it up?”
You get the point?
Self-talk dramatically affects self-confidence. Oh and I KNOW you talk to yourself! Let’s be honest here…we all do it, every single day don’t we!
It’s perfectly normal though, nothing to be ashamed of and I DON’T actually want you to stop talking to yourself either.
Rather I want you to focus on the “content” of your self-talk.
You see, your results are the summary of what you focus on each day, so STOP saying to yourself that you’re fat, because you will stay fat forever! Stop calling yourself “stupid” or “an idiot” or “a failure” when you make a mistake because all you’re doing is setting yourself for failure on a consistent basis! Stop complaining that you’re “broke” because guess what?? Yep, you got it…you’ll stay BROKE!
Having this attitude will not create any true momentum in your life, it will only drag you down and make you feel even worse.
So instead, here’s what I want you to do…
Focus on what you freaking WANT in your life for you and your family!
Another way to improve your self-confidence is to talk to yourself as you would talk to the LOVE OF YOUR LIFE! With respect, patience, appreciation and attention…
Try this simple exercise for the next 7 days and you will be amazed how things start changing within you and around you:
- As soon as you wake up, go to the bathroom, look into the mirror and say to yourself :“Good Morning” imagining that you are talking to the LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.
- Be mindful of what you find yourself thinking about. Monitor ALL your thoughts and self-talk throughout the day focusing only on what you want.
- If you catch yourself on a negative line of self-talk, don’t panic! It’s going to happen, and more than once so don’t worry about it. Simply apologize to yourself, imagining again that you are talking to the LOVE OF YOUR LIFE and say “That’s not what I meant, what I meant to say was….” and switch your self-talk back to something positive.
- Throughout the day try to complement 3 different people and acknowledge them for how they made your day.
- Before you go to sleep, clear all the thoughts of the day and imagine yourself for 10 minutes in your desired shape, in your perfect relationship, having your perfect job and just doing all the things you always dreamed of doing. Immerse yourself in these thoughts as you drift off to sleep, and when you wake up, start the whole process over again!
Yes, there will be times when you might feel a little silly. Let’s face it, this is all new and it’s a habit that you need time to get used to. But when you see the difference it makes in your life against the alternative of staying just as you are, in a state of negative thinking, weighed down by an overwhelming lack of self-confidence, don’t you feel it’s worth giving it a try?
I hope you do and I would love to hear your results at the end of the 7 days, so don’t forget to come back and leave a comment on this post!
If however, you feel that your lack of self-confidence is truly overpowering you, that it’s stopping you from achieving your goals and dreams and that you need some help to get you out of the situation you find yourself in, why not get in contact with me and we can have a chat about what you can do to help yourself and more importantly how I can help you right NOW.